I am feeling very nervous about tomorrow. Partly because my parents have been reminding me about tomorrow ever since they made this appointment and partly because I am not exactly sure what one is supposed to do. I am meet my lawyer(?) to help me get approved for benefits. My father keeps asking 'do you have the paperwork?' If that means a printout of the never-ending questionnaire I filled out then yes I do. If not? Then I have no idea what he means.
I have come to realize doing forms online is easier and harder all at the same time. Easier because you can type things up and not have to waste stamps when sending them back. Harder because most of the time no one else in your family does things via online forms and gets all uptight about this handy dandy new way. Then I get stressed out because I cannot give them the 'stuff' because you do all of that online. It goes on and on until I just keel over from confusion.
All of this could not be at a worse time. My fatigue level is at an all time high. I look more dead than alive with my body seeming to agree. All I want to do is conk out somewhere and hope I wake up healthy. Talking about my health requires such energy. I just do not have it at the moment.
The most I can hope for is not to do anything stupid tomorrow. Stupid meaning I fall asleep while discussing my case or have a serious case of the shakes and spill all over myself. I suppose spilling hot coffee on myself would be one way to keep me awake but it sounds painful and would be a complete waste of my father's secretary's coffee skill.
I think the best order of business is to 'retire' (I love that it reminds me of old-fashioned movies) for the night. Either things will work out or won't. At least the weather will be in the below thirties. Perfect temperature for my crazy inner thermostat.
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